Once Upon a Rhyme: Volume 1 of the Charming Tales, by Jack Heckel
"The dragon is dead. The princess has been saved. There is but one problem: Prince Charming had nothing to do with it.
In order to save his royal reputation, Prince Charming must begrudgingly enlist the help of accidental hero William Pickett. The two set out on an adventure that has them fighting trolls, outwitting a scoundrel, and drinking the foulest ale ever, collecting bruises to both body and pride along the way. Meanwhile, the rescued princess, Gwendolyn, turns out to be one dangerously distressed damsel, and an evil presence takes over Castle White in Charming’s absence …
Enter this rollicking world and discover just what happens when a fairytale leaves the well-trodden path of “once upon a time.”'
Prepare to be charmed! This book is a delightfully witty and hilarious take on your classic fairy tales.
Wil and Liz Pickett are the grandchildren of none other than Jack (of beanstalk notoriety) and their family's good luck has been ruined by their ancestor's obsessions with growing giant beanstalks that were never giant enough and attempting to get geese to lay golden eggs. What nonsense! Liz has taken care of her brother since she was a child, and while she loved the fairytales of her childhood, she knows that in the real world, there are no dashing knights that rush in to save the day. Her brother, however, is a bit more of a hopeless romantic. When the dragon attacks their farm, he rushes out to lead the monster away from her in a misguided attempt at heroism. But in a stroke of good luck, Wil's pitchfork impales the dragon and ends its reign of terror. With the dragon dead, Wil feels compelled to rescue the princess that the beast kept locked in the tower for a generation, and when he returns the girl to the king, his reward is to be made Lord Protector of the Realm.
The problem- the prophesy declared that Prince Charming was supposed to be the hero, and now, the bungling Prince is determined to prove himself the superior man. Oh, and the rescued princess? She's just a tiny bit insane. And Wil and Liz are just farm kids trying to navigate the ridiculous world of nobility, save the kingdom from a conspiracy and possibly find true love.
I loved it. The book is really funny, and clever. There are tons of fun spins on the stories we know- my favorite was a hilarious scene in which Prince Charming was trying to woo Rapunzel and suddenly decides he needs to get out of the tower right now, and uses her hair as a means of escape, while she is screaming at him that he is ripping her hair out! I mean, what was he thinking?
I can't wait for Volume 2!
Amazon has the book for your kindle right now for $1.99!!